My younger sister could not be more different from me. We just look at the world from very different perspectives, and neither one of us is bothered by this. She was always the more social of us. The keg-stand, bar brawling, woo-hooing kind of partier. I had John Waters, photography and my own bottles of liquor I didn’t feel the need to share with anyone else. My distaste of beer during my high school years ostracized me pretty immediately from a lot of our peers (when I say younger sister, there is a less than a two year difference between our ages so there was some overlap with friends). And when they branched out from beer, that was pretty much to concoctions based around Southern Comfort and soda. When I think of my sister and cocktails, I think of this drink.
The Pop Rocks here are added for sensationalism. You know what they do? They SPIT IN YOUR FACE when you add them to this drink. That’s so young Hollywood starlet of them. Stand over the glass and try it. To me, this is also a super girly drink. My sis would swig this down, and then maybe punch a guy out for not holding open a door for her. The name and drink are also inspired from an Instagram conversation I stumbled upon. Local bar La Descarga, for their monthly Tiki night, created a list of drinks based on red-headed beauties like Lucille Ball and Jessica Rabbit. And punctuating the end of that list was Lindsay Lohan. A line from another follower summed that up with … “I thought a lohan was a red headed slut and coke”. What a perfect name for a Low Rent Cocktail. And perfect ingredients, Some SoCo and Coke. The coke here taking on a double meaning. Clearly. 
So, for the Low Rent Cocktail of the month, I present the Lohan.
2 oz. Southern Comfort
3 oz. Coca-Cola
half a packet of strawberry pop rocks, or more if desired.
In a double rocks glass filled with ice, build the drink by adding the Southern Comfort first, then coke. Perhaps stand back a ways as you pour in the pop rocks. They will explode a bit.
A sugary strawberry explosion in your mouth. That is what you get with the Lohan.
My sister could probably party Lindsay Lohan under the table. Right now she can’t because she’s about to give birth to her first child. But even pregnant she’d rip the drink right out of Lohan’s hand and pour it over her head if she felt disrespected. Actually, she’d probably just do it because the opportunity was there. The original title to this post was just going to be “A Red Headed Slut and Coke”. I didn’t name it that simply because I knew what kind of traffic that would have brought in. Large numbers, but misdirected. Stayed tuned for the Holiday Editions of the Low Rent Cocktails, promising to bring shame to you who imbibe them.
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